How Do You Thrive? 5 Natural Ways to Thrive

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How do you thrive? 5 Natural Ways to Thrive

What does it mean to thrive?

According to standard definition, it means to grow, to flourish, to prosper.

This is a beautiful term, something that resonates deeply with anyone who wants to encourage and inspire wellness. 

In terms of wellness then, to thrive means that we are constantly encouraging wellness within ourselves, within our bodies, and of course, within our minds.

It is something we all aspire to develop throughout our lives. 

It is an overall sense of wellness and trust in ourselves that we will continue to grow in a positive manner as time passes, and be able to meet the challenges that lay ahead of us.

 To thrive is something beautiful and it is something that each of us can learn how to do. 

How Do We Thrive?

We thrive, quite simply by allowing ourselves to and by encouraging ourselves to do so. 

For some, this is easier said than done. 

There are many people who have tried to thrive, but who have faced too much difficulty in their lives, and they eventually give up believing because they think their life is just not cut out for it. 

For some, early difficulties in life have robbed them of their belief in their ability to thrive and seek professional help.

 Some may overcome their negative beliefs by finding a loving relationship. 

Sometimes, we enter really difficult times in our life when it just seems too hard- when we are grieving because of a death of a loved one or a relationship breakdown, or extreme financial difficulty or loss of a job at a late stage in life. 

I believe that all of us encounter times when we feel as if we are stagnating but there is no static cycle to thriving- the cycle between ups and downs may just be longer at times. 

Eventually, most of us get to a point where we think things have turned around and we are thriving and coping well with meeting life head on. 

 There are some things that we must understand about thriving, about constantly evolving, growing, and moving forward.

Knowing How To Thrive

To know how to thrive we must fully understand the process. Thriving, though the definition is of growing, prospering, and flourishing, is not always a case of thriving.

Sounds contradictory doesn’t it? Let me explain.

The tree that thrives in nature faces many obstacles.

 It faces potential destruction in its early stages by animals walking by that could possibly crush it underfoot. 

It has to compete with all the other trees and plants in the forest to get the sunlight it needs and even when it has fully matured still it must face gales and storms and through all of this, it must continue to strive towards thriving.

It can be seen then that thriving is not actually something that is achieved; rather it is something that one must aspire towards and to do that we must accept that we will face challenges.

Indeed in order to thrive it is essential that we face challenges and it is also essential that we overcome those challenges or at least have a mindset that will strive to overcome them.

5 Natural Ways To Thrive

Motivate Yourself  

Without motivation, it is impossible to thrive. 

Motivation is inspired through passion, whether that is related to doing something for yourself or for others, maybe your passion relates to providing a future for your children. 

It doesn’t matter what motivates you, use your motivation to thrive. 

Use it to grow, and to push you to the next level.

If you follow your passion, it does not seem like hard work.

 'Do what you have to do until you do what you want to do' is a great saying by Oprah that I use to motivate me when I am doing my work online.

I don't try to compete with others who have been working online for many years so I listen to their wisdom and try to add my personal touches.

In terms of achieving my goals, there is a saying that has helped me and really sticks in my mind.

 'If you continue to work on your goals, you may or may not succeed but if you give up you definitely will fail.' 

 Everyone is different so this may not do it for you, but it certainly does it for me. 

Giving up on your goals and dreams equals 100% failure. So find a positivity quote that motivates you and hits home base for you.


Get this free 10 step checklist  How To Stay Motivated

For more reading on Resilience, visit this post

Accept all challenges 

When you are challenged, you are forced to thrive. 

This doesn’t mean that when somebody challenges you to a game of pool for example, and you win the match easily, that you are thriving.

No, a true challenge is something you find difficult, something that you cannot easily achieve, something that requires that you grow, or learn a new skill, or visit a new environment or face a fear, to achieve. 

This is true thriving, pushing your boundaries, expanding your limits, forcing yourself to thrive.

Another great quote that inspired me was 'If someone offers you a challenging task, say yes then figure out how to do it later.' 

This worked for me as I was a perfectionist and would shy away from things if I did not know the steps to get there!

Face your fears 

Face Your Fears

Fears, in every case, are designed to limit us. 

By facing our fears, we are pushing ourselves into an area of life that we have been too afraid to visit. 

To truly thrive we must want to be able to do anything and we must be able to do everything without limitation.

 In order to do this, we must allow the formation of mental barriers to what life presents us with.

Everything that comes our way can be used as an opportunity to thrive and by facing our fears, we will make the most of every opportunity that does.

Early in my career as a teacher, our placements and many promotions were based on numerical rankings. 

When I shifted to another state, I had to attend job interviews for the first time and I was highly anxious. 

The way I got through this was to say to myself' 'what is the worst thing that can happen?'

 The answer, of course, was that I would not get the job but I would gain experience. 

However, by pushing and preparing myself, I am happy to say that I was successful at 5 job interviews! So it was certainly worth pushing through my fears and anxiety.

Balance 

Balance your life from the perspective of ‘Body & Mind’.

 In order to truly thrive,  we must develop a way of life that promotes balance. 

If we cannot promote physical wellness then our mental wellness will struggle and the same goes in reverse. 

By developing balance physically and mentally, we allow our spirits to thrive.

I learnt the hard way as I let go of all the things I enjoyed and just focused on work....... and paid the price for it!

 My close friend said that I had undergone a complete personality transformation as I was trying to be an excellent teacher in autism (autism was new to me) and I was also trying to be there for a partner and elderly parents.

I can now understand things that were beyond my earlier understandings and I write from personal experience, not from a psychology or medical degree.

Develop harmony

Harmony is something that is very important when it comes to thriving. 

Without harmony, we face too much opposition in the world, and this opposition leads to restriction of our ability to express ourselves.

If we cannot express ourselves freely, we cannot thrive.

 Learn to accept what happens around you and even within you.

Be selfless as it encourages harmony and not only will you thrive, but you will see that everyone else that you interact with will also, in their own way, will thrive.



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You may be interested in this video
Finding a Balance Between Selfishness and Selflessness   

Does this resonate with you? Write a comment below if this has been a concern for you.

HOW DO YOU BUILD THE MINDSET MUSCLE-RESILIENCE?

How Does One Build Resilience?

We need to build resilience from an early age as children need to be prepared for life and, as adults, we will come upon times of overwhelm, grief, sadness, or darkness.

As I reflect upon my childhood, I remember having to do so many things without the support of my parents. 

If I wanted or needed to do it, I just had to figure out a way to do it, without relying on them.

That is not to say that they were not good parents but times were different then. My parents were very hard-working migrants who came to Australia with nothing but a few precious things they could bring with them.

They came at a time when there was not the support that migrants have now so dad, who was a highly skilled waiter, making lots of money overseas, had to work as a carpenter while mum worked in a factory making televisions. 

She went for an interview with little English. while walking up and down the streets in town and just happened to talk to someone who sent her to this job.  

I remember dad saving his money to build a bungalow and my sister and I sleeping on a wooden table, for a while. 

These days, parents are constantly running their children from one activity to another, and kids get chauffeured to school, with few exceptions for those who walk or catch the bus.

 In fact, there are Walk to School programs to encourage children to walk to school.  How many people worry about rain in case they get a little bit wet?  My sister and I walked through sleet to get home and then drained our shoes as they were filled with water. LOL.

 I do realise that it is a different world today and, with distances being covered and safety issues, parents want to make sure their children get to school safely. 

The point is not really about walking in the rain or the heat- it is about persevering and pushing through things, without making excuses, giving up, and getting out of our comfort zone.

My memories of  my personal challenges:

Reflecting on my early memories of my childhood, I had a lot of fun but it was because I had things I wanted to do and, as my parents were not always available, I had to find a way to do them myself.  

   Walking to school through two suburbs in the fierce heat or the pounding rain as a young child. 

   Walking to the church by myself on Saturday morning- again through 2 suburbs-so I could get to the 7 a.m. confessional (I took religion very seriously then).

   Catching a bus in the morning to the pools in summer, making sure I had some food and drink for the day, and often having to walk an hour home in the blistering heat because the bus driver didn’t feel like making the stop! (starting from 8 years old)

    Having to do my own homework and reading activities as parents, in those days, were not expected to help and simply did not have the time. If they worked, they did not have modern conveniences, like washing machines, but battled with the wringer!

    Working in my dad’s shops at an early age, during busy periods. I had to weigh the customer's fruit and vegetables and add and give correct change, using only mental calculations. It gave me great responsibility and dad trusted me. 

 
   Preparing for exams in high school but still having to honor all other family and personal expectations(later, we brought all our family to Australia and it was expected that you visit regularly and celebrate birthdays on the day of the birthday- not leave it until the weekend. It could be stressful!

    Having a part-time job at 14, and having to walk half an hour in the dark on wintery
    Saturday mornings to catch a train to where I worked. 

         When I saw a difficult educational task that my sister was doing, I would say to myself “That’s okay- I will be older and then I will understand.”

   Being the interpreter for my parents and one of my aunties and uncles from a young age.

   Having an asthmatic baby and having sleepless nights, then going to work.

   Working full time and taking my four children to their after-school activities-sport and dancing- doing school preparation most nights after they went to bed, and then sewing their costumes until 3 a.m. before concerts, and then working again in the morning. This was an endless cycle for many years and I was so tired all the time. I ended up with chronic fatigue and left teaching for a few years, so I could spend quality time with the children. 

    Going through a divorce is a grieving process but, all of a sudden, there are many things that need to be organized and extra money to be found to live. It's overwhelming but you have to push through. 

    Most people have daily challenges and busy periods that come in waves throughout the year.

The reason I mentioned the above is that I realize that I have learned to push myself to achieve my goal. 

Sometimes I felt as if my bones were exhausted but I learned to take each day at a time.

So those experiences are very personal to me and shaped the person I am.  

It has helped me through a very challenging time when I found out what it was like to want to give up and  I experienced an extreme low, which was out of character for me.

Somehow, I got through it, even though I found it difficult, I still turned up for work and asked for help in the right channels, to build my resilience again. I refused medication to help me get through my depression and turned to my community and my work, which I enjoy. Reading about Gratitude and its power to change your mindset and allow happiness in was the real game changer for me. 

Personally, I went to a counselor but I did not find it useful. It may work for you but she was possibly in her early 20's and was of no help whatsoever. The power of gratitude worked better than a counselor in my case.

Building resilience since childhood is the factor that helped me on my journey: to keep seeking answers, and eventually that led me to appreciate the power of gratitude, as I refused medication.

 

Strategies to build resilience

WHEN FEELING OVERWHELMED- DOWNSIZE!

What has helped me during my studies and working online is to break a task into small, manageable steps and focus on only one step at a time. 

This also helps you to prioritize what needs to be done, and in what order.

So it actually clarifies the task mentally for you, which in turn makes you understand what you are doing and gives you momentum.

MAINTAIN AND MAKE NEW CONNECTIONS WITH LIKE-MINDED, SUPPORTIVE COMMUNITIES

I read that the saddest thing in life is to feel that no one cares about you and not be able to share meaningful experiences with those who have the same values.

 A handful of caring people who listen to you can be the difference between a person giving up or deciding to push through a very difficult time.

These are the people you let into what is happening in your life. They teach you the difference between positive support and negative judgment. 

It can be surprising where that support comes from! 

REMEMBER THAT REALITY IS REALLY SOMEONE’S PERCEPTION OF A SITUATION.

You can choose your reactions to any situation and, if you stay connected to your meaningful communities, you will find that different people have different reactions to the same situations.

When I was concerned about a family member's perceptions and behaviour, I visited a trusted doctor to discuss what I was seeing and hearing.

It was valuable as he verified what I had been thinking: that the person had an undiagnosed social disorder. 

Then, you need to be proactive and protect yourself as sometimes you can trust family values and compassion but not everyone thinks like you do. 

Don't disregard your gut feeling and professional advice! 


Remove yourself from situations where one can manipulate situations and bring you down. 

Look for ways to change negative situations into positive situations. 

The challenges in front of us can teach us to improve ourselves if we choose to learn from the experience.

On a personal note, my life changed drastically a couple of years ago, when the workplace I had spent my life working at, got rid of all senior personnel who were well respected in their profession.

They had a need to cut costs because of a variety of bad financial decisions they had made throughout the years as they had not made necessary changes earlier. 

They were then forced into making financial decisions that hurt a lot of loyal, highly experienced staff.

It was a blow but it taught me so much.

 I do not think I would have learned how to build websites, learn internet marketing, blog and make friends from all over the world, and make a successful re-entry into mainstream teaching if the changes to my career had not happened. 

And my teaching career has flourished!

COPING WITH STRESS

I have worked in the Autism area for many years and we had to actively teach our students strategies for emotional control so they could cope better with their world, which could often be distressing or confronting for them. 

 Under the guidance of the Occupational Therapists, each student had a calming strategy suited to their level of functioning.

Lack of emotional control affects our body’s functioning in a negative way, as well as impacting those around us. 

Yoga can help us to focus on our breathing and take the focus of whatever is upsetting us. 

The focus on our breathing will control those hormones that build up with anxiety and damage our bodies.

  A simple technique with the children I taught, was to breathe in and then out to the count of five. 

I taught the Zones of Regulation to all the children in Grade 4 (targeting an autistic, ADHD, trauma background student) and they loved it. 

We also taught them to recognize their symptoms so they could use the technique independently, such as an awareness of their heart racing, flushed face, etc. 

Hopefully, they will be well prepared for their adult years. It gave them strategies to use when they identified the need for it and we had very positive feedback from the parents.

This is a simplistic account of the more in-depth strategy we employed with children. 

For adults, if you don’t do Yoga, you can do a breathing exercise by choosing a number e.g. 3, then breathe in to the count of 3 seconds, then out for the same time and repeat for 3 minutes. 

You can increase the number you wish to count to. 

This is a method also taught to those in dangerous situations eg. those soldiers who go on dangerous missions and combat, such as the Navy SEALS, so don't dismiss its effectiveness. 

You may be interested in this post What are the symptoms of unwellness, especially the Self-Care section.  

VISUALISATION STRATEGIES

When I was involved in Party Plan, as a part-time income, we were taught to put pictures on our fridge of goals we wanted to attain. 

Most people would put up pictures of holidays, cars, houses, and other items they wished to buy. So the focus was always monetary-based.

However, I use this strategy now and I use it in two ways.

 Firstly, I imagine what success looks like to me and, secondly, I think about the consequences of failure. 

Both these imaginings keep me on track with my goals. 

I may feel dispirited on a particular day but I never give up as I have a great imagination and just could not bear the consequences of failure!

Through webinars, I learned to have a long-term goal and use this as a starting point.

 For example, if you have a financial goal for the year, you then use the first strategy mentioned above to break it down into smaller, achievable steps. 

You break that yearly goal down to a monthly and weekly goal and, from there, you can work out how many customers and sales you need to attain your yearly goal.

You can apply the visualization strategies to other areas of your life e.g. to keep you on track with your studies, a blog, or a program to become a successful sports player. 

  It is also important to use this strategy of visualization often – so daydream often!!!!

DEVELOP GRACIOUSNESS BY SHOWING GRATITUDE.

There has been a great emphasis on showing gratitude on Social Media this past year. 

Lots of great posts are appearing that talk about being grateful for things, such as being alive, having a roof over your head, someone who cares for you, daily food, etc. 

 My post  Does gratitude contribute to wellness? goes more into depth on this topic.

Sometimes, it is hard to be positive when you have had something happen during your day that upsets you. 

It can override all the positive things that may have happened throughout your day as it has an intensity to it that overrides all else.  

To develop a more positive mindset and feel better, it helps to get into the habit of reflecting upon your day and thinking of at least 3 things that made you feel better. 

It can be as simple as someone sharing a joke with you, or a stranger smiling and saying ‘hello’. 

 Some people are advocating the use of a Gratitude Journal to get into the habit of thinking about the positive things that happened each day, rather than focusing on one negative thing and letting the bad reflections build up during the week. 

It helps develop a positive mindset, which is critical for a happier life and the attainment of your goals.  

You can check out the Gratitude Bundle resources here.

If  you want to test your resilience, take this quiz

I  hope you found this post helpful. Subscribe to my blog below and get notifications as to new posts. 

What are the Symptoms of Unwellness? Part 2

Symptoms Of Unwellness

A general feeling of “unwellness” can mean many different things and can manifest in various ways.

It is important first of all, to identify exactly what it is you are feeling when you experience “unwellness.”

We touched on symptoms of unwellness and some basic ways to increase your overall wellness in   Does Your Lifestyle Support Your Wellness?

What are your specific symptoms? 

They can vary widely and from person to person: everybody is different. 

Do you feel tired or lethargic all the time?

Do you suffer from aches and pains? Are they in the joints or the muscles?

Do you find that your performance in daily tasks is suffering?

Are irritated, stressed out, and annoyed much of the time?

Are you overweight?

Do you sleep well or do you find that even though you seem to sleep all night, you wake up feeling as if you've been pulled through a hedge backwards? 

Is your sleep light and fitful, where you are woken up by the slightest noise? Do you find yourself waking up every night at the same time, say 3am, and then finding you cannot get back to sleep again until the wee hours?

Are you taking medications? 

Have you checked the possible side effects?

 Could these be contributing to your feelings of unwellness?

Possible Medical Causes

These are dependent on many factors and it is very difficult to pin down exactly what might be causing your malaise. 

This section states the obvious but it is included as a vital part of looking after yourself holistically ie. the whole person.

Some common conditions that cause a feeling of general malaise include chronic fatigue, depression, fibromyalgia; you could have anemia or low blood pressure, or, you might have a urinary tract infection. 

Problems that are more serious can include HIV and AIDS, cancer, diabetes, and adrenal gland dysfunction. 

If your feelings of malaise go on for more than seven days, it is wise to see a medical practitioner.

The most obvious step is to discuss your symptoms with your doctor who is going to give you a thorough check-up and an educated diagnosis.

 It is important to get your health checked out to rule out the possibility of anything serious, or, if it is something serious, to catch it early and hopefully treat it successfully and prevent major problems from developing further down the line.

Your doctor will give you a physical examination and probably want you to get some blood tests or x-rays done to rule out certain problems such as thyroid disease or cardiovascular problems.

Identifying Your Needs and Deficits

Optimal wellness begins when we address the whole person, also known as Holistic Wellness. 

This means that we need to take care of your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing, along with considering our financial (the main cause of stress for many people) and occupational wellness. 

In order to assess your own wellness, it’s important to take an honest and comprehensive inventory of your life and self to identify problem areas in order to begin the journey to reach an optimal level of wellbeing.

Basic Ways You Can Improve Your Overall Wellness

Manage your sleep: 

There are a number of ways to help your sleep: for instance, don't eat after 6pm. 

Try to turn off your computer at least one hour before you go to sleep. 

Reading is a good way to make yourself drowsy last thing at night. 

Meditation or listening to a relaxation recording can be helpful. 

Drinking a cup of warm milk before bedtime is soothing and helps you to settle down.

Eat well:

A sensible diet with plenty of leafy greens and fresh fruits and vegetables is key to feeling well. 

Try to avoid too many carbohydrates as these can make you feel sleepy and light-headed.

Exercise:

Exercise in moderation is beneficial to your overall sense of well-being. 

Walking for half an hour daily can help you feel better. 

Start with a minimum of 3 times per week, if it is new to you.

The benefit of walking is that you get the benefit of fresh air and sunshine, which is necessary for your body's healthy functioning and feeling better.

We have a walking machine but I lack the motivation as I would rather go outside! My partner loves it so do what works for you.

When I wasn't working, I used to walk twice a day, for about 30 to 45 minutes each time. 

It was easy for me as the area we lived in was beautiful, with lovely gardens that were very fragrant. That was very motivating for me.

The extra bonus was that I lost 3 kilos in two weeks, without changing my diet!

Rest and relaxation

 Getting enough of both of these will ensure you feel and perform your best.

 Make sure you have enough rest at night and break your workday into work and rest cycles. This ensures optimum efficiency.

I advocate the use of the Pomodor method for integrating rest periods into your workday. 

It is when you break your work into cycles of 25 minutes work, followed by a short break of 5 minutes or whatever is needed to recharge your batteries. 

After four of these cycles, you take a longer break e.g. half an hour. 

 At the end of each cycle, put a check on a sheet. 

This will ultimately be your feedback as to your efficient working hours throughout the day.

This method keeps you consistently productive and the regular breaks support your motivation and creativity.

By having regular breaks and staying on tasks in work cycles, you will have improved attention span and concentration.

You need to set your alarm to notify you of the cycle's beginning and end.

Drink plenty of water and avoid alcohol, sugary drinks, and caffeine

 Water can help flush your body of toxins and avoiding stimulants like sugar and caffeine can help calm the nervous system.

Sometimes, our body can't tell the difference between hunger and thirst so before you reach for a snack, drink some water first.

On a more personal note, I notice that my skin looks much healthier and has a healthy glow compared to when I drink coffee. 

That's when my skin is duller and my eyes look more sunken in!

Reduce Stress

 

Whenever possible try to eliminate stress from your life. Create a calm and welcoming home environment. 

Avoid people who are negative and complaining. 

Keep up away from toxic people who are drama queens.

This may be difficult if it is family but you may have to re-evaluate how much stress you can take and put some distance there for your own mental health.

Find time to have fun.

 Connect with others and grow your social network. Laughter alleviates stress.

Take a stock of what interests you and pursue it actively.

Self-care 

At the core of all successful wellness attempts is self-care. 

This means making yourself and your wellbeing a priority, it is truly the foundation of your wellness.

My personal experience with self-care, or lack of it, when I was trying to do it all for others led me to a path of absolute exhaustion and depression. 

I did not know how to ask for help or let others know how run down and terrible I felt.

 I should have asked for help as you cannot gain their understanding unless others know what is going on. I

 hated being a complainer and being disloyal to others and it impacted me, both physically and mentally.

Improve your Overall Wellness- Keeping It Simple

Have you done the Health and Wellness Quiz? Reflect on the different areas of wellness and start new habits.

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