"Confidence is a state of being clear-headed either that a hypothesis or prediction is correct or that a chosen course of action is the best or most effective.
Confidence comes from a Latin word 'fidere' which means "to trust"; therefore, having self-confidence is having trust in one's self.
The concept of self-confidence is commonly defined as self-assurance in one's personal judgment, ability, power, etc.
One's self-confidence increases as a result of experiences of having satisfactorily completed particular activities.[1]
Self-confidence involves a positive[2] belief that in the future, one can generally accomplish what one wishes to do." Wikipedia
How does a lack of confidence manifest itself?
Do you feel intimidated by challenges at work?
Or do you feel like an outsider desperately trying to be accepted?
Or do you have family challenges and keep it bottled up instead of being able to share how you feel?
Resentment and unhappiness can slowly creep into your life as the problem gets bigger with time.
Confidence is like a muscle; the more you use it, the stronger it gets.
The same is true for our confidence. When we lack confidence, we feel like we’re carrying around a heavy backpack filled with rocks.
Even the tiniest thing can set us off balance and cause us to stumble or even fall.
There’s a common pattern that people follow when they lack confidence.
They do everything they can to avoid any situations that make them feel uncomfortable or vulnerable. They try to be more like “normal” people, so they don’t draw attention to themselves.
This means they don’t speak up in meetings or work extra hard to make sure their work is perfect.
Confidence is a funny thing. It can come and go. It's like a wave. Sometimes you're on top of the world, and other times you're drowning in self-doubt and uncertainty.
Confidence is often described as the feeling of being good or great at something.
It’s having a strong belief in your abilities and being unashamed of who you are.
It’s the ability to face challenges head-on and the ability to rise above adversity.
Confidence is the fuel that propels you to achieve your goals.
How to become more confident:
1. Don't let yourself go!
Even if you work at home, take care of your presentation so that you are proud of how you look daily and dressed appropriately for the situation.
So dress in a way that you feel good about yourself, do your hair, and put on a bit of makeup (I have dark circles under my eyes so I cover them with a touch of concealer as they make me feel ugly).
2. Forgive yourself.
If you made a mistake or didn't perform at your best, don't beat yourself up with guilt but focus on your assets and what you did well.
For example, I'm an expert in autism and I recently had a bad bout of covid. Upon my return to work, my leader asked me a simple question and my mind went blank.
I was so embarrassed as I help others understand autism.
I brought it up with her and apologised and told her my mind had gone blank, and it was possibly the after-effects of covid. She knew my work and I simply told her I was embarrassed by that situation and it had been on my mind.
3. Positive thinking-retrain your mindset.
Think positively about your goals and what actions you need to do to achieve them. And then action them!
Say 'yes' to what your old self may have thought impossible.
4. Prioritise and lessen stress.
Get the most important things out of the way first to release a build-up of anxiety.
The morning is the best time to tackle the most pressing, undesirable tasks.
5. Use a long-term planner and daily to-do list daily.
A planner and to-do list is a great idea as you can tick off all you have achieved daily and weekly, even monthly and yearly, and feel a sense of accomplishment.
6. Develop new habits.
What habits would be beneficial to you to be more productive?
Make a list of habits that could stop you from wasting time, then package small amounts of time throughout the day to incorporate a more productive routine.
Can you find small parcels of time in your day for self-care, your to-do list, journal entries, social media, emails, etc?
7. Commit to accepting and acting on problems as they arise.
Accept problems will arise but commit to solving the problems when they present themselves, and the more confident you will become.
The faster you solve the problem, the more confident and relaxed you will be.
8. Practise gratitude.
Journal your gratitude. The best thing about journaling is looking back on your notes and remembering the great things that happened throughout the year.
Think it, if you don't get the time to write-it's okay to sit back and reflect on your day and express your gratitude for the positives in your day.
Express your gratitude to others and smile.
Gratitude, happiness, and confidence are closely interlinked.
I can share that, on a personal level, gratitude made a great difference in my life and opened many doors for me.
Make a list of things that challenge you and then tackle them, one by one.
These are things that you consciously avoid but you know that it would be better to overcome them.
You don't have to be great at everything so choose things that you think are important to do confidently, and make sure you make them achievable ie a SMART goal.
That means breaking it down into smaller parts so that is manageable for you to achieve. Then move on to more goal setting once that is achieved.
10. Inspiration and mentors.
Choose people who inspire you and use them as your mentors or role models.
They can be people who are online and have shown great success in the field you are in.
Find out how they accomplished their achievements and the challenges they had.
It is a great lesson to learn that they most probably had some adversities that they had to overcome before they became successful.
You will learn that people achieve by doing, even those who are not 100% confident. They take action.
11. Know your strengths, talents, and achievements.
Successful people are laser-focused and they delegate if something is not their demonstrated strength.
12. Identify where you can make a difference.
What will make you stand out with your contribution?
This guide with worksheets, Mastering Self-Doubt and Insecurities, will help you gather some healthy insights into the real you and start to develop new habits to retrain your negative thoughts.
This comprehensive pack will focus on seeing yourself in another light, and motivating you to problem solve and take on challenges that you are comfortable with, as you grow and develop in confidence.
It can be used in helping you become more confident in any situation, be it family life, friendships, or work-related situations.
Something special for those of you wanting to become successful entrepreneurs. If you develop the traits of successful entrepreneurs, you will become confident too.
If you follow this course, it will help you in any field of work.
These insights will help develop the success mindset.
Successful people integrate these 24 practices, skills, actions, and mindsets into their everyday life.
Most importantly, these 24 factors that contribute to success are the starting points to any dream of being wealthy, fulfilling a dream, or building a successful business.
So learn to optimise your strengths and develop new skills that are needed.
This course is a downloadable 27-slide course that you can keep and watch in your own time.
I work at a school of 3000+ students so it was inevitable that I would eventually get covid, especially as I have contact with 12 classrooms, teaching literacy skills.
I had a meeting on Tuesday about my work and, later that night, I received a phone call from the person I had a meeting with that she had just tested positive for covid.
That was Tuesday and by Thursday afternoon, I was starting to feel unwell.
That night, the headaches, fever, body aches, and sore throat started. Followed by constant coughing.
My covid vaccination history
I had my booster 3rd vaccination 3 weeks prior to this. It was awful.
I had a different booster to my first two vaccinations, which were Astra-Zeneca. The booster was pfizer as it had the omicron elements added.
The symptoms were quite severe for a week. I went back to work the following week but it was very difficult getting through the day.
I went home and just collapsed on the couch as my headaches were bad and my body was aching terribly.
The following week I felt better and that's when I had the meeting and contracted covid. Neither of us had been wearing masks and we sat quite close to each other.
I had taken mine off as I was working in my office and simply forgot to put it on, as we were not always wearing masks at school.
Living with Covid.
I had a fever for 2 days and occasionally afterward. The sore throat took a week to subside but I had facial numbness on the right side of my face. Even my ears! I liken it to getting a strong injection from the dentist to numb your mouth.
I could not stop coughing and eventually tore a muscle along my left rib cage, which made coughing painful. My back also hurt from the coughing.
The coughing was unproductive and the tickle would not go away.
At night, I started to wheeze as I lay down, and my nose would block up, making breathing difficult.
The headaches were constant for one and a half weeks. Sometimes, they would subside for a few hours but then they would come back.
Same for the body aches and pains and exhaustion-just carrying the groceries they had delivered to my kitchen left me breathless.
I think I started to panic as, unlike colds and flu, you do not get cumulatively better each day. When you think you're getting better, boom! Back to square one.
As I'm older now and need medication for blood pressure problems, and I have a history of cancer, I was quite worried as I kept hearing that I needed to be monitored as things can change quickly with covid.
I suppose, at the back of my mind, I was anxious thinking I might be the one it changes to the dangerous level.
The fact that a healthy school teacher in her 40's had died on her second day of being tested positive did not allay my subconscious fears.
So the psychological effect of covid is quite impacting on mental health, along with the need to isolate when sick.
Getting over covid.
My doctor just said 'take panadol and rest' but it wasn't working.
I was really panicking about my endless cough so my daughter bought me some Benadryl and some vaporizers to help me breathe at night.
I put eucalyptus oil in the water to help me breathe and stop the coughing.
I drank copious amounts of lemon tea, laced with Apple Cider Vinegar. Our chiropractor advised us that this would help.
A few days after I had initially contacted my doctor, he rang me to check on me. I think he heard my foghorn voice, as my chest was congested, and he finally prescribed some antibiotics and Ventolin.
I was wheezing slightly when I went to bed but found that the Vicks Vaporub and vaporiser helped to stop the wheezing.
Covid practices in Australia
In Australia, we have to contact the relevant government department when we have a positive covid result. They put you in contact on a daily basis with doctors and nurses, who call you each day.
I cannot even praise them enough as they helped me enormously through a difficult time.
This was such a great service for me as the doctors and nurses ring you daily for a week to monitor your symptoms. You can extend this service if you feel the need.
Unlike doctors in these finance model clinics, they have all the time to chat with you. I needed that as I was waking up at night in a heightened state and they could talk me through it.
They gave me the number for the Nurse On Call, which is a 24-hour access number, in Australia.
They sent me medical equipment e.g. oximeter to measure my oxygen levels, at no cost to me. They informed me how to get my meds delivered and my groceries, and asked if I needed any other type of help.
They asked about mental health issues as people are not coping with being ill and being in 7-day lockdown. They were great as my doctor only has a few minutes to talk about the essentials I needed and how I felt.
Where I am now with Covid.
It's been a week and 5 days since I became ill.
I am not suffering headaches all day long but just get occasional twinges throughout the day.
I am not challenging myself with physical activity but still get very tired. Some nights I sleep well while other nights I just can't sleep and feel anxious.
I am still coughing but it is bringing up small amounts of phlegm and it's more settled. But my back is still hurting, my chest still feels heavy, and my voice is still a bit hoarse.
My work entails me going up and downstairs to 12 different classrooms. This amounts to 10 kilometers of stair walking in 3 days.
I have a Health app that I used to measure my walking at school.
There is no way I feel ready for work at the moment as a healthy person can get quite breathless with the distances walked at this very large school.
I'm hoping to be back on board next week!
Have you had covid?
What's your experience been like?
* update: Been back at school for two weeks and am absolutely exhausted and having difficulty thinking as I am still having headaches!
So glad I am having an Easter break and resting. This covid is crap.
**further update: had to have another covid test as headaches severe and spent last night shaking with cold sweats, then alternating with burning up with fever. It's been 5 weeks now since the original positive tests.
Cold sores are a common viral infection. They are tiny, fluid-filled blisters on and around your lips.
After the blisters break, scab forms that can last several days, or even weeks, and they can be quite painful.
They are also called fever blisters.
My experience with cold sores.
My very first experience was when I was about 4 years old and we had been to church. My parents decided that they would like to visit friends, after church.
I was absolutely starving as I hadn't eaten since breakfast and it was going onto lunchtime.
Thankfully, our family friend offered me some delicious Hungarian Csabai sausage, without bread, and sweet tea. It was delicious and I scoffed it down but I broke out in huge blisters on my lips later.
I still get these blisters if I eat this sausage without bread, when I'm hungry.
Strange- I can eat it without any side effects when I'm not particularly hungry but I get blisters if I eat it when I'm hungry. So that indicates an allergy for me.
However, they usually pop up on my lips before a viral infection, such as the flu. They will appear a few days before I get sick with a viral infection.
Visit my online shop Ebooks To You for health and wellness tips
Best cold sore treatments:
I seemed to be plagued with cold sores since then so it was important for me to find treatment for them as they were painful and embarrassing.
For me, they lasted about 3 weeks until the final scab healed.
I found the ointments and creams from the chemist to have problems.
A popular treatment was Zovirax. I used that for a time but found that it dried my lips out to such a degree that my lips were painful, cracked, and bleeding for weeks.
I looked for other solutions.
Garlic
Mum's old fashion home remedy!
As soon as you feel that tingle, you cut a garlic clove and rub it on the spot that is tingling. This will actually reduce the size to a small, hardly noticeable lump or it may go away completely.
You will feel the sting of the juice on the spot. I don't use it if I'm leaving the house as it's very strong when applied to the lips.
Petroleum Jelly
My mum discovered this when she became very sunburnt. She was very fair and her lips were covered in blisters, even though she did not usually have cold sore blisters.
She rubbed petroleum jelly (which was one of the Gods in our medicine cabinet) all over her lips. The pus started oozing out and they healed very quickly.
This works like a dream so I stopped using Zovirax and used it instead.
You will notice the ooze as soon as you apply it. Sometimes, a large cold sore would be flat by the morning and completely healed in 3 days.
No painful, cracked lips and no more cold sores for 2-3 weeks.
Vicks Vapor Rub
One day, I felt the tingling but I didn't have any petroleum jelly. So I substituted it with Vicks Vapor Rub!
You have the added benefit of menthol. It works well.
Zinc
Once I started zinc tablets, it was bye-bye cold sores. It's amazing how well it works, and it's great for your nails and hair, as well.
Paracetamol and rest
When you get a cold sore, you may be coming down with a viral infection (like me), or stressed.
The pain does affect you as, in my experience, my brain feels quite foggy and just not right. There is a distinctive mild pain I feel until I get a fever or the viral infection rears its ugly head.
So bed rest and paracetamol will help you in this stage of your illness.
I hope these hints help you with those very annoying cold sores.
Has anyone else experienced cold sores related to allergies?
How I lowered my blood pressure significantly with a natural remedy
I would like to share my experience with hypertension/high blood pressure and my management strategies that helped me overcome it. Yes, I went beyond high blood pressure and was in the hypertension zone.
While taking medication to get me out of the danger zone, my search for other remedies helped me find a natural remedy that I incorporated into my daily regime successfully.
I trialed days of taking medication and ginger and compared them to days that I took medication only.
The results when taking ginger were always favourable.
It has now been about 7 months that I initially visited the doctor and found out I had hypertension.
My readings are now consistently excellent and I attribute that to the natural remedy I used.
Note: I am not a medical practitioner and I do not advocate that you do not follow your doctor's advice, regarding blood pressure medication.
My History with Blood Pressure
As a young woman, I had excellent blood pressure readings. So good, that the doctor always commented on it. My father was the same while my mother always had high blood pressure.
More recent history with Blood Pressure readings.
As I’m older now (67), I was starting to struggle with walking, getting up and down from sitting positions, and having swollen feet and ankles. This had started to get worse over the years and I put it down to aging and arthritis.
High blood pressure never occurred to me.
However, in 2020, I had a relatively easy, non-physical job during the pandemic, teaching a student 1:1, with multiple mental health diagnoses.
It became quite stressful when students returned to classes after our covid lockdown as he had substantial issues with making friends and his high-level misbehaviour and aggression were impacting my wellness.
Each day felt like I had been climbing mountains-extreme tiredness, muscle and joint pain, foot and ankle swelling. I also had vertigo.
There were many times I just shut up and didn't tell others how bad I felt. Upon reflection, I should have prioritised my wellness.
At work, they had provided me with a special chair to make it more comfortable and easier for me to get up and down.
Finally, I went to the doctor and told him how each day was such a struggle to get through and my symptoms. I thought anxiety and arthritis was impacting my body.
He took my blood pressure and I was shocked-it had gone past high blood pressure, and was in the hypertension zone ie. almost 200/99.
He prescribed medicine as he said I was risking a heart attack or a stroke. I am not averse to taking medication but I usually do research and see if I can try natural methods.
The doctor said that, if I did not take the medication, he would take my Driver’s Licence away from me. He wanted me to understand the seriousness of hypertension.
Taking blood pressure medication
I started taking the tablets and, slowly, my blood pressure started to come down but it was still erratic. Also, I started to cough and this usually became worse on going to bed each night.
I remembered my mother taking her medication and how she coughed so badly over a few months until her doctor realised that it was this particular medication that made her cough.
She was quite angry as she had been going to the doctor about her persistent cough for many months and her ribs hurt from coughing. She had many sleepless nights too.
So I told my doctor about my coughing and he changed it to Telimarsartan and slowly my cough disappeared.
Previous medication was Perindopril arginine 10 mg.
A Natural Remedy for Blood Pressure problems.
I have always been interested in natural remedies for ailments so I researched natural remedies for blood pressure problems online.
Although the medication I was taking took me out of the danger zone, the readings were erratic and not low enough for my liking.
It would sometimes be in the high 140’s, then jump up to 150’s and 160’s.
I read that ginger was good for blood pressure so I bought a jar of ginger and drank it with my tea in the mornings. I put half a teaspoon of crushed ginger in my tea.
Whenever I drank ginger tea, my blood pressure dropped to 130’s! Same as when I was a young woman.
I would highly recommend taking ginger in some form, if you have blood pressure problems as it consistently works for me.
Note: my blood pressure is excellent now (7 months later), even if I forget to include ginger each day. However, I will still include ginger throughout the week in my tea or in my cooking.
Other things to action with blood pressure problems:
Exercise
Keep mobile, even if it's only a walk each day.
When I was tied to my computer with online teaching, my blood pressure was always higher. One day, I went out shopping and came home exhausted from all the walking.
I was surprised when I took my blood pressure reading as it had dropped to 130’s, at a time when my blood pressure reading was in the 150’s daily. Although I felt very tired, the walking had helped my blood pressure drop substantially.
Adequate sleep.
As you get older, I find that you develop a different sleep pattern.
I wake up earlier and, even though I stay in bed, I do not sleep deeply.
When I am at home, I try to have a ‘nanna nap’ in the afternoon. If I'm super tired after work, I will have my 'nanna nap' when I get home and then wake up to cook dinner, etc.
I'm making adequate sleep a huge priority.
On days I am working, I try to get to bed in a reasonable time.
If I’m super tired, I lock my phone so no one can disturb my sleep, including all the notifications you get online.
Stress.
Try to control your stress and practice mindfulness and positive thinking methods, such as developing the daily gratitude habit. (It takes 30 days to develop a new habit).
The nature of the job I was doing in 2020-2021 was extremely stressful and impacting on my sleep and my mindset.
Teachers who work with very challenging students can suffer great stress.
If they are working in a Special School environment, they are given extra support and timeout, for their mental wellbeing.
Thankfully, although I was in a mainstream school, the school was concerned for my health and wellness and found a new position for me within the school.
Lose Weight-especially around the waist.
Your heart doesn't have to pump as hard when you lose weight. It helps to manage those puffy ankles!
Eat a healthy diet
Along with increased exercise, this will help you to lose weight.
Limit your alcohol and coffee.
This is important. I had a very busy day, with lots to do online and I drank *!!**!!* cups of black Italian Espresso coffee.
I woke up at 4am feeling extremely unwell (it was scarey) and was not able to go to work that day. I will never do that again!
Limit your smoking.
Yes, smoking is not a great habit. I'm lucky it's not one of my vices as I've had some operations and the surgeon said I'm lucky not to have smoked as it can also impact on recovery from surgeries.
I hope these reflections will help you, if you have blood pressure problems.
Do you want to help those suffering the effects of poverty in third-world countries?
If one of your New year resolutions is to look beyond your bubble and help others in poverty, this information from Michael Noetel a psychologist and senior lecturer in the school of behavioural and health sciences at the Australian Catholic University will guide you as to how you can help and which charities are most cost-effective ie. a high percentage goes to the charitable cause.
It only takes a few dollars to help.
I have seen my friends very ill with malaria and parasitic infection. I have seen my friend's son lying on the dirt floor of a tribal doctor's hut, very sick with malaria. It's heartbreaking.
Can you spare $5 to prevent a child from getting malaria or even less for other medication? Saving children from infections and blindness only takes a few dollars a month.
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